I Was Gang-Raped by MetLife Employees: Another Open Letter to the People of Earth

Dear Earthling,

I think you should know that I was gang-raped by roughly a dozen employees of the so-called Metropolitan Life Insurance Company, a.k.a. MetLife, my former employer.

I’m guessing you’ll find it super important that I’m using the term gang-rape here in a purely figurative sense. I too would have thought as much, back before I got gang-raped, and especially before I spent months obsessing about the ordeal and trying to figure out what to do about it. But I have recently reached the other side of all that insanity, and I’m happy to announce that when considered from this new perspective, the real differences between literal and figurative gang-rape are simply not such a big deal.

Please don’t misunderstand me here. Of course an old-school gang-rape in the literal sense could be and even most often is worse — even much, much worse. But I can easily imagine cases in which the rapists might take extreme precautions against physical injury, disease, and pregnancy (perhaps by using gloved and lubricated fingers to gently rape a man’s anus) , which would in no sense change the fundamental nature of the crime, nor mitigate the ensuing psychological consequences. To my view, such a physically gentle, injury- , disease- and pregnancy-free crime would be no less a gang-rape than, say, the infamous football-team-beneath-the-bleachers variety.

In my own case, the perpetrators indeed took extreme measures to prevent physical injury, disease, and pregnancy — but I really couldn’t care less about any of that. These individuals nevertheless gang-raped me, in my opinion (for now, at least, and until I encounter the sort of evidence that might change my mind). Much of what I have written in this blog documents my sincere and enthusiastic attempts to find some other way to describe the experience[1], but after months of trying, I have utterly failed to find any other way to put it that doesn’t cause a serious misunderstanding between me and anyone I might wish to tell: you, for example.

Please know that I am fully prepared to endure and respond effectively to any skepticism or objections you or anyone else may have with respect to what I’m claiming here. Especially if you are one of the perpetrators, or a MetLife employee or officer, or a member of the company’s governing board, or a stockholder, or really anybody at all with a stake big or small in denying what these MetLife employees did to me, I am ready for all of you. So please, don’t be shy about expressing yourself or sharing your thoughts and concerns with me.

Finally, as a rule, no matter who we are, no matter what problems we have or ordeals we endure, somewhere out there someone else has it worse — much worse. I am quite certain, for example, that you in particular, whoever you are, at some point in your life, were quite possibly really gang-raped in a way that by comparison makes my own ordeal look like a nice back massage.

If you are such a gang-rape survivor, or indeed anybody else who has had a rougher go of things than I have in Life, and this due to any reason at all; please know that any advantages afforded me by my obviously much lower martyr-status — for example, those resources (financial or otherwise) that I have come to control by virtue of the fact that I am a college-educated white man of middle-class upbringing living in a world that was mostly designed by and expressly built for guys like me (or at least, the ones who aren’t autistic) — I wish to assure you that I am wholeheartedly committed to applying those advantages to the task of making the world safer for you and for everyone that matters to you.

If you have any suggestions for how best to do that, I would love to know about them.

Thanks for reading this.


The Walrus

[1] For an example of such an attempt and general overview of the events in question, see An Open Letter to A Certain EEOC Deputy District Director.


  1. I read all the parts of the EEOC open letter and I love your creative pseudonyms. Also in regards to the email, it seems like they set you up to fail, so to speak. If the original three thought it was in any way inappropriate they had a duty to counsel you on that.

    Before I was disabled with fibromyalgia, I worked for a very large corporation in a management position. There are rules to follow and first off, you *never* mess with someone’s ADA rights.
    I’ll have to dig around in your blog and read the rest of this mess.

    I hope things are better now, for you and your family.

    Liked by 1 person


    1. Thank you, for saying all of that. Trump’s EEOC is a very different thing. If you haven’t yet then I encourage you to watch (Trump’s fox in the EEOC hen house, acting Chair) Victoria A. Lipnic’s frightening, Feb. 9, 2017 pep rally with Seyfarth Shaw, which is actually where Batman works (he’s a partner), and the law firm where Lipnic used to work before Obama appointed her to one of the EEOC commissioner posts in 2010. She actually reassures the SS troops that she has always seen the EEOC as the “underscore ’employment opportunity'” commission, suggesting that the whole “equal” thing is to be swept aside in favor of creating jobs. I found it quite illuminating, and it explains explains why Batman felt so comfortable some 10 weeks later on (April 24, 2017) telling me to my face in front of an EEOC mediator “believe me,…if MetLife wanted you out, you’d be out!”

      Liked by 1 person


  2. People are so out of it today. Many are worse than wild animals. I feel for you and pray your life will get better day by day. Blessings to you and lots of love…MG…XXOO



    1. Hey Goober Peas, welcome to my blog, and thanks for taking the time to read and comment! 🙂

      Regarding your question, I’m not really clear on what you mean by nuts or certifiable crazy. I do have Autistic Spectrum Disorder (a.k.a. “ASD” or “autism”), which is listed in the DSM-V, and I take medication for anxiety and mood stability, if any of that fits your definition.

      Regarding my rants, might you be more specific? Was there something in particular that you find “crazy”? If you’re referring to my decision to use rape as a metaphor for the Civil Rights violation that my family and I endured last year at the hands of the above mentioned MetLife employees (and a few others too), then however much I may understand and respect your Right to think for yourself and form your own opinion on this or any other matter, I am also quite sure that at this point you must still missing a great deal of information about that ordeal and what it means for me to be autistic.

      I wish I could say that I have completely documented on this blog all of the relevant information that might answer those questions for you, but I’m afraid that is still a work in progress. However, if you would like an overview of the actual Civil Rights violations that I’ve decided to compare to a rape, I recommend starting with An Open Letter to a Certain EEOC Deputy District Director. I wrote that back when I was still referring to MetLife as the “XYZ Insurance Company”, and when I was using “Batman” as a pseudonym for Frederick “Fritz” T. Smith, but if you make those substitutions in your mind as you read the letter, the rest of it should make sense. (Note: I have not yet revealed the true identities of the others referred to in the letter by such pseudonyms as Wonder Woman and Hawk Woman, etc.)

      I hope that addresses your concerns, for now at least. Please let me know if you have any additional questions.

      Daniel 🙂



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